When you've lost it, you've lost it

After my last doctor debacle, I called my new dentist's office to confirm I actually had an appointment for a cleaning after work today. I called the office 10 times (uhh starting to get nervous), and finally got someone to answer the phone without hanging up on me ... and SCORE! I did indeed have an appointment at the office where I made the appointment.

The bus came quickly and dropped me off right in front of the office. Well. Not so much an office as a ghetto-ghetto strip mall. The dentist was located next door to a Thai Massage place that kept its blinds closed. Yeah. One of my co-workers recommended this doc, so I crossed my fingers and persevered inside.

I signed in and the staff was pleasant enough. However, while I was waiting for 20 minutes or so, there was a child roller skating in the waiting room. skating. waiting room. round and round he went. I wanted to trip him, but was mostly concerned he was going to run over my toes. His mom just watched him go. round and round. back and forth.

I was called back to the room, and seated in the dreaded chair; sports played on the 13-inch TV in front of me. The dentist immediately sat down beside me to review the paperwork I filled out. I am more accustomed to the hygienist making the initial appearance and the dentist poking around later, but I thought that maybe this guy is nice and wants to meet new patients.

Ahhh but the surprise is on me... He is a dentist SLASH hygienist. Yep. He does his own cleanings, and the handy assistant simply sucks all possible moisture out of my mouth.

Now for those of you that have thought, like I, "WHY does the dentist get paid the big bucks to poke-poke and they are done?? Why do they even bother showing up when you don't have a cavity?" Well let me tell you ... be so very thankful you have a separate hygienist because this was the most violent, bloody teeth cleaning of my life. I literally had to close my eyes because I couldn't stand to see all the blood the assistant chick was sucking away. He even managed to make the polishing part hurt, jamming the polish firmly into my recently mutilated gums.

After he was done, he abruptly left and the assistant handed me a dixie cup of water and told me to take it to the bathroom to rinse and spit in order to get the polish off my teeth.

Huh?

Yes. I walked down the hall with 2 ounce Dixie cup in hand to the grossest gas station-esque bathroom you can imagine to spit where many had spit before me because apparently they have no silver water squirter and no sink beside the dental chair.

After paying, I hopped on the bus and immediately took some Advil for my severely enflamed gums. I thought about calling someone but realized that I didn't think I could talk without causing further pain so... I transferred to the train and took a nap and mentally crossed yet another LA doctor off my list. I really should start some sort of service where I can make some money off of my bad fortune... I could call it Lemonade Referrals (making lemonade out of lemons... get it??).

Soooo .... Anyone know a good dentist? :)